Activity: Developing High Quality Connections

Introduction

Scenario 1

Janelle accepted your invitation for an information meeting. 

You have been looking forward to connecting with they/them because they/them works at an organization that you are curious about. 

It was decided that the meeting would be located at Janelle’s office. 

Once you’ve introduced yourselves and conversed for about 10 minutes, you notice this: 

Video by Karolina Grabowska: Pexels

Take a moment to reflect:

• What are the thoughts and storyline going through your mind?
• What are your initial reactions and how do you feel about Janelle’s actions?
• What are your assumptions or conclusions about Janelle?

Scenario 2

You are attending a professional conference and register for one of the networking events. The first activity invites pairs of delegates to meet for 45 minutes to get to know each other. You are matched with Tom, one of the delegates.

Shortly after the introductions, Tom asks you about your workplace. You begin to share and notice that Tom interrupts you as he describes his workplace.

Tom then asks you about your approach and beliefs about leadership. You notice that moments after you start answering his question that Tom interrupts you by expressing his leadership style and the importance about listening and leading staff.

Tom asks why you decided to attend this conference. You release two words from your mouth and Tom's cell rings. He picks up the call and gestures as he raises his hand, he'll be a moment.  

It appears that Tom cuts his call short, comes back to the discussion and continues to talk about his workplace in great detail with the remaining 20 minutes.

• What is the narrative running through your mind?
• Have you made any assumptions about Tom?
• How would you describe Tom’s listening skills and ability to create trust?

Think about those questions for a moment before clicking the next button below to find out how to build HCQs.

Building HQCs

Perceptions

Next, take a look at this image. What do you see?

Image by Gordon Johnson from Pixabay

The image portrays two side profiles of a person (in white) mirroring each other. From another point of view, this is an image of a black vase. 

• How does ethnicity, upbringing, and age impact how you see the world?
• How do your perceptions influence how you present yourself to the world, how you listen and what you hear?
• Have you considered whether or not you walk with power and privilege, and how this lens affects what you see and experience?
• How do assumptions influence cultivating HQCs?

After reviewing the actions to cultivate HQCs and reflecting on the image, which portrays different perspectives at the same time, continue to the next page to review scenario 1 again.

Review scenario 1

Read Scenario 1 again:

Janelle accepted your invitation for an information meeting. You have been looking forward to connecting with they/them because they/them works at an organization that you are curious about. It was decided that the meeting would be located at Janelle’s office. Once you’ve introduced yourselves and conversed for about 10 minutes, you notice this:

• How might you perceive and react to Janelle from a different vantage point?
• What are possible scenarios that Janelle could be experiencing? 

For example, what if Janelle was up all night with her son at the hospital, hadn’t slept, and was feeling stressed and worried?

Or, maybe Janelle feels like you did when Tom talked the entire time? Is Janelle bored of a non-stop monologue being 'told' at her?

What is one of the actions (below) that you could take to build a HQC and trust with Janelle, 

1. Take an interest in the person
2. Be consistent and reliable
3. Be present
4. Practice radical listening

How might you integrate this conscious way of thinking and being to future, real life situations?

Reflection Activity

Now, think of a project you were involved in. 

In what ways:

• did you create a positive rapport with your associates? 
• were your your words and actions consistent?
• were you able to practice being present?
• did you show you were listening? 

Rate yourself on a scale of 1-10, 1 (lowest) to 10 (highest) for:

1. taking a genuine interest in other people and their interests
2. being consistent and reliable
3. your practice with being present with others
4. your listening skills

What are your strengths with building trust and HQCs?

Are there any areas you rated yourself on the lower end of the scale and want to develop? If so, what specific actions do you want to take? Are there any actions you want to add to your 26-WEEK Challenge?

This module and the scenarios touch on the mindsets, values, habits, and skills you can integrate to strengthen your relationships. As a friendly reminder here are a few reasons behind investing this time and effort, you could:

• earn the trust of another human being,
• learn a completely different perspective that could be a life-changing paradigm shift,
• find a mentor,
• receive a job offer.

We don’t often take the time to reflect on our bias, our actions, and reactions. Awareness is key and the first step to change. Being present, dependable, and actively listening are essential to creating trust and strong connections.

You have reached the end of this activity.

Tip: Click exit book below to go back to the main page, or take this shortcut to move directly to the module summary.