Mindset and Skills Essentials

Working through conflict is not a one-size-fits-all process. Sometimes it can be simply a matter of clarifying a perception. 

Ask yourself when it comes to resolving conflict, "how much does the relationship mean to you?" "Are you willing to invest the time and effort to repair the situation?"

Start a conversation with open questions and consider following through with the mindset and skills listed below.

Mindset

  • Set the stage by envisioning a positive outcome for all parties involved and try to keep this vision in the forefront of your mind
  • From the outset, try to see the person in front of you, not their age, culture, or gender, for example. Seek to find common ground, e.g., service to clients or shared values
  • Go in with a mindset that the other party has good intentions
  • Be conscious of your assumptions, for example, do not assume the individual is angry with you, they could be distracted by something going on in some part of their lives.
  • Be curious and open to learn about the person in front of you

Skills

  • Apply communication and EQ skills (adaptability and positive outlook), as well as empathy and ask open questions, e.g., “how might we come together to resolve this?” Or “tell me more about…."
  • Problem solving and critical thinking skills will also be valuable
  • Be highly aware of your paraverbal communication, the volume and tone of your voice.
  • Likewise, pay close attention to how you are communicating nonverbally.


Impart radically listening (jmw.com, 2015). Be present. Listen. Listen to hear the individual's perspective and what they need, rather than thinking about what you want to say or becoming defensive.

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